Open Letter: Sex

An open letter to my girls (and all ladies I love) about sex ,

I know it might seem strange to be writing to you both about these things since you are both under the age of two. However, its been on my heart and I figure that I should think about these things long before we actually have to sit down and talk about them. Here is what I know and what I want you to know as you are growing up.

The first thing I remember knowing about sex and what I want to say first was what I heard from my Mom... SEX IS AWESOME! This may be strange for some families to hear and some may think "That is what your Mom chose to tell you?" Yes, it is and she was 100% right. Sex is not wrong. It is not dirty. It is intimate and special and fun and pretty much every good thing you can imagine plus more. You are probably thinking "Ew, Mom!" like I was but its the sweet sweet truth.

This brings me to my second thought, SEX MATTERS. This might seem to go without saying but I don't think so. Women are hyper-sexualized in the media- magazines, tv, the internet... but you aren't just a body. You are a mind and a soul in a body. You can't disconnect all three but frankly, your body is what matters least when it comes to your value as a person. That being said, you and only you have control and power over your body. The way you dress and present yourself to the world, who you kiss, hug and hold hands with. Who you love matters. Who you have sex with and when matters. Don't let someone make the decision for you. It isn't a decision to make lightly or quickly.

Why? Thirdly, SEX COMPLICATES THINGS. Now, this isn't saying that sex is bad or wrong. Complicated doesn't necessarily equal worse or more difficult. I am just letting you know it changes thing. Because your mind, body and soul are connected, what you chose to do with one effects the others. It can effect how you feel and how someone feels about you. It can change what you think about your relationship. It might make you see things in a different way.

I am telling you all this because YOU DESERVE THE FAIRYTALE! You know all those stories we read together while you were growing up and all of the Disney movies you watched? They can come true. No, you will most likely not become a Kate Middleton type princess (sorry to burst your bubble) but you will find someone who loves you for exactly who you are. Whether you have the perfect body or the smartest brain won't matter because this guy will love you for all the good things about you and the love you have to give. What won't (and shouldn't) matter is what you do or don't do in the bedroom. If you have to do something, anything, to make someone love you or want to be with you, they aren't the one for you.

How do I know? Well, this is where is gets mushy and gross again- your Daddy. I love him and he loves me. We would be happy to know that you will just live with us the rest of your lives but we know that won't be the case. Addi, you kissed a boy at church today. Then tackled him. Truth be told, we want you to experience true love and all is has to offer, including sex. Our hope for you is that you understand all these things I just shared and chose to only share that part of you with one person. We want your life to be life to be full of all the good things and unfortunately, sometimes sex be used negatively. Although this is my hope for you as your Mom, there is nothing you can ever do to make me love you more or less and making the decision to have sex wouldn't make you damaged.

My prayer for you is that you guard your heart. Only love boys who deserve it and love you back. Only marry boys who love you as much as your Daddy. Above all things, know you are awesome and you as a person matter much more than sex ever could. I'm here to talk about these things and will strive to be as open and honest with you as my Mom was. I'll even share my own story, my own fairytale with you. I love you more than the moon and stars,

Mommy

One last embarrassment- Addi this is the day you were conceived <3